Thursday, March 17, 2011

I honest-to-god forgot it was Thursday.

Dear Diary,

13.  SETTLE DOWN.  If you're taking my frothy-mouthed ramblings during and immediately after a race seriously, relax. I don't hate Colorado today.  I love Colorado.  I just don't want to RUN in Colorado any time soon.  Not without a generous cutoff, that is.  I'm at least gratified to read that this is one of the harder races up there.

12.  RECOVERY.  Amazingly, on Monday, I had no stiffness.  No soreness.  None.  For all my bitching and whining last weekend, I had no soreness even the next day, although my legs were tired.  By Tuesday afternoon, my first run of the week, well, I felt slow.  The legs were tired.


11.  SCHOOL.  I have cleared a major hurdle in getting the internship for my final year that I wanted, in that the personality-disordered individual (whom I will call TINY MAN) in charge of field experiences at my school has generously agreed to sign the internship application I asked him to sign to the agency where I want to go. TINY MAN, for the record, is younger, far less experienced, and far less educated than I.

This magnanimous gesture on his part required only 9 days. During this time he claimed 1) he did not receive any of my emails. I have two READ RECEIPTS that inform me my emails were displayed on his computer; 2) he informed me that he did not appreciate hearing that I was upset after I waited in vain 45 minutes for him when he told me what time he would be arriving to the school, and 3) I avoided going off on him about exactly which axis II diagnosis I would give him, and 4) no small amount of flattery, southern charm, and ass-kissing works.  I don't get it.  It always works.  ALWAYS.  He is not charmed by me.  I'm not alone, though.  None of the student in my cohort at my school care much for him either.
Mordac, meanwhile, has partially redeemed himself by taking the time to explain to me how "read receipts" work and assuring me that, indeed, TINY MAN is a liar.

10.  INTERNSHIP, 2011-2012.  Now all I have to do is interview for it and get it.  I'm still waiting to see if I get called for an interview.  Fingers crossed.  It's at the VA hospital, which is where I'm hoping to be employed some day.

9.  MILES.  I does them.  After a shaky start, my miles so far, according to my training plan:
week---planned---actual
1--10---9.2 (um~)
2--20--22 (ok!)
3--30--18 (UM.)
4--40---30 (!!!)
5---45---45 (YAY!)

8.  SPRING!  I'm wild about it!  Longer days.  YES!  Fewer things to wear!  Mostly, I'm excited because I made it through another winter, but this one was without weight gain, losing too much of my training, or major panic attacks.  My only complaint about spring:  Windy days and lip gloss.

7.  PRETTY. For my birthday last week Sweet Baboo gave me a top and a running skirt from SkirtSports in Pink Crush Play Print.  Coincidentially, it is exactly what I wanted.  How did he know?  He accidentally ordered the skirt in a small (bless his heart but no, I'm not a small) so I'm going to exchange it, but I got to wear the top at the Colorado marathon craziness on Saturday.  By the way, if you were asleep, you missed the 50% off sale at SkirtSports this week.  It's over now.  GO GET ON THE MAILING LIST.  NOW.

6.  PROUDLY LAST.  According to the results posted, I beat Sweet Baboo by over two hours in Saturday's marathon.  Hey, we wore the numbers they gave us, IT IS NOT my fault if they switched them.  Their times are off by 15 minutes also.

5.  Married, with CHILDREN.  Life after your kids move home is just aggravating.  It just is.  I teach some of the New Employee Orientation, and part of what I teach is family systems.  I talk about roles, and rules, and how when you go home, it's hard not to slip into old roles.  As in, kids who go home and start acting like teenagers again.

  THINGS I WANT TO SAY and what I actually say:

GET OFF THE FUCKING INTERNET, YOU'VE BE ON IT ALL DAY.
Tomorrow I want you to get on the bus and start looking for a job.

STOP EATING ALL THE POPCORN.  IN FACT, DON'T USE UP THE LAST OF ANYTHING. BECAUSE I DON'T HAVE TIME TO GO TO THE DAMNED STORE DURING THE WEEK.
Tomorrow I want you to get on the bus and start looking for a job.

DO NOT PRESUME TO MOVE MY IPOD DOCK INTO THE SPARE BATHROOM BECAUSE IT IS CONVENIENT FOR YOU UNLESS YOU PAID FOR IT, PRINCESS.
Tomorrow I want you to get on the bus and start looking for a job.

PUT YOUR SHIT AWAY, IT'S STILL THE GUEST BATHROOM, NOT YOUR PRIVATE BATH.
Tomorrow I want you to get on the bus and start looking for a job.

Right now, what I have started doing is turning off the Internet between 9 pm and 5 pm the next day.  If I didn't do this nothing would get done.   Meanwhile, she has lost 16 lbs in 4 weeks, which is a good start.  I am hoping that HR where I work will call her soon.  Did I mention she is on the phone 24/7?  Yeah.

4.  Okay.  This is going to be completely useless to many who will be like, what?  She needs to get a life but I'm so excited about it that, well, there you go.  I am growing my hair back out again.  I wore it very long for a long time and then three years ago tried an experiment and cut it very short, and short doesn't work for me, so I'm growing it out again.  But at work, I want something quick, easy, and professional looking.

For a long time I've used actual chopsticks, pencils, pens, what have you-to keep my bun in place.  I don't use anything that is harsh or squeezes or rubs too hard against my hair because long hair is old hair, and you need to be nice to it, or it won't be nice to you.

This little double-helix looking thingy pictured at the right is called a spin pin. I don't know if I'm the last person in the world to hear of these, but you twist your hair up into a bun, spin them in - one into the top, one into the bottom - and your hair stays in place. No tangling, no getting anything caught in your hair.  It's awesome.  And that is my non-race product review for today.

3. WOO-WOO SIGHTING OF THE WEEK.  So, I teach a two-hour new employee orientation twice per month.  In my section, I talk about assessing kids to see if they can read social cues.  A hand goes up.  Yes?
New employee: What about kids who, you know, can just sense how others feel?
Me: I don't get what you're talking about.
New employee: I'm talking about empaths, who can just feel the energy of others and know how they feel.

*cricket* *cricket*
Me: I don't have an instrument for assessing 'empaths'.


I found out later that this woman considers herself an 'empath.'  Apparently, she can read the energy of others and just knows what is going to happen next (Which begs the question, why did she ask me that question?  Wouldn't she have 'just known' how I would respond?  But anyway.) Now, the way I figure it, this woman is going to come crashing down.  I imagine it will be the first time a kid turns around, spits at her, grabs a handful of her hair, or calls her a fat fu**ing bitch!  (Because, well, she's a kid and she's having a bad day, and she's in a mental hospital, so why not, that's what they do) and someone is going to say, so, didja feel that one coming on? Didja?  

2. Coffee.  Nope, still not drinking it.  I'm in a non coffee phase.  Everytime I buy one, I drink about one third and the rest just sits.  I'm still heavy into my 2/3 diet mountain dew and 1/3 diet cranberry grape drink.  That's what I drink all week long at work.  I go over to WalGreens across the street on Mondays, usually, and buy 2 bottles of diet Mt. Dew and some diet Cranberry.  Mmmmm.  Did I mention there's an ice machine at work?  Am I crazy to be this excited about having ice at work?  I don't care.

1.  YOGA.  I miss it!  I need to get back into it.  And swimming. Maybe even biking, or spinning.  Oh, I can't wait to be done with classes!  there's so much one can do when one is not in grad school.  And swimming - I get to use the 50-meter pool on base.  Who knows?  I've heard there's these things called triathlon.  I might even try one.

...

3 comments:

  1. For some reason I feel compelled to point out that she's confusing empath with telepath. Knowing the feelings of others, that is empath, but then knowing what would happen next would require telepathy. Maybe she didn't know somebody was going to notice the discrepancy? ;)

    I recently read about an article about study that found that many people wish for telpathy as a superpower. Personally, I would want telekinesis because knowing what would happen next isn't as useful as being able to react by throwing stuff at somebody with your mind!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Maybe she's a telepempath. And your prediction for her sound like all those fresh young girls in my teacher ed programs who were going into teaching because they just loved kids and kids are so real and sweet and they couldn't wait to mold young minds. And of course, all those things are true, but sometimes the "real" part isn't so rose colored.

    And I'm so looking into those spin pins. I have long hair that I keep considering cutting before realizing that my short hair will look like crap, too, AND be incapable of pulling into a ponytail.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Anonymous6:41 PM

    Triathlon will welcome you back. No hard feelings. My ultra training right now is making the 3 sports much more attractive.

    ReplyDelete

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