Thursday, February 04, 2010

Thirteen random 3am thoughts.

  1. I'm not sure why I think that when I wake up at 3 am, unable to sleep, doing Sudoku in pen will soothe me.  It doesn't soothe me.  It just pisses me off.  I get down to that last row, and realize that the only thing that will work, an "8", is already there.  GAAAA!!!!
  2.  I googled "Sudoku in pen" on images and got this.  OMG.  Want. It. 
  3. We have the most amazing printer at work.  It. Is. Awesome.  It's a giant behemoth of a machine, but I can print my 6-7 page reports to it, and it will print out 3 copies, collated, back-to-back and STAPLED.  That's all.  I'm just excited about this printer.  it kicks ass.  That's all.  I just wanted to share that.
  4. WeightWatchers is already working.  I don't get this: I don't feel much different, and I'm not starving, but I've already lost my first few pounds.  This was how I lost my first 30 pounds back in 2005, 10 of which I've gained back...oh, what the hell:  If paying $17 a month means that it works, I'll sell plasma, if I have to, to make it happen.
  5. This week's WeightWatcher's experiment is brought to you by brown rice.  I put about a quarter cup of it, cooked, into each meal during my work day.  I know it sounds weird.  Somehow, it works, and helps fill me.  It's got protein and fiber, too.  But it has to be brown rice.
  6. The following occurs about once every other week or so where I work: I'm sitting at my desk, and I see a hysterical, sobbing kid running down the hall past my office.  Usually they're running in a very dramatic way.  We have a special RTC track for kids who have emotional regulation problems.  Anyway.  So a few seconds later, they're following by floor counselors who are themselves running, panting and yelling into a radio.  So as the floor counselors run by my office, they glance in, and I point in the direction I saw the kid running.  They nod and haul ass by my office.
  7. On Friday, I decided,  screw winter.  I'm going to dress like it's spring today.  At least, indoors.  I selected crop pants and a sleeveless top.   I wore a heavy woolen coat outdoors.  But inside: spring.
  8. Denise, at work, is funny.  She asks me to do things, which are pretty much part of my job, and tells me it would be amazing if I did it.  As in, Hey, do you think you could use a binder clip on those really big case files?  that would be amazing.

    Hell, I've always wanted to be amazing.  So of course, off I go in search of binder clips.
  9. I was really get stuck into knowing that I was middle-aged, and it was really bumming me out, so I made a decision last last week, which I shared with Baboo, and now I'll share with you: I have decided that I will ignore the 20 between when I first started making bad decisions and when I got my proverbial stuff together, such as my first viable graduate degree.  I choose to subscribe to the delusion that I am only now embarking on the adventure of life.
    This doesn't mean I'll give up the experience and wisdom that came with those years, just that I choose to ignore that I'm turning 45 soon.  I'm not.  I'm turning 25.  I intend to start acting and feeling that way and hey, DON'T HARSH MY MELLOW.
  10. I have a teacher who actually holds us accountable for the readings.  As in, we have to comment on it and junk. Like, I don't have a life? (see, I'm acting 25 already)  There's no way around this, if I don't and she calls on me, I look like an idiot.  (Big, heavy, sight of self-entitlement here)  So anyway, I have a formula: the first ten minutes of class, I talk about (a) something in the four or five readings that were assigned, often the only thing I read, and how (b) it reminds me of this incident that happened to me once. I talk at length about that.  She's very excited.  Then for the rest of the class, I don't have to say anything.  I've contributed, and I'm done for the night.  Try it.
    But remember: we never talked.
  11.  So, there's this company in New Mexico (OPTIMA HEALTH) that was hired to administer the public insurance for children because I guess some people think it's more efficient add a layer of stockholders between the service delivery providers and their patients.
    Anyway, they've done a terrible job.  Last year they went for months without paying people, and some smaller clinics closed down--recall me complaining about not being paid at my old job--not because there are less children who need treatment, just this bastard company who won't pay.
    Finally the state fined them over a million dollars, which they agreed to pay.  Then in January, the governor, Bill Richardson, announced they'd be bidding out this contract.  (aka: you're fired.)
    ANYWAY.  so immediately, they got really stingy.  Like, I'll send them an assessment of a kid who is off his meds, slicing at is wrists, swallowing Listerine, and running away home with pedophiles Optima would be like, "why does he need residential treatment?  What else have you tried?"
    So, I have to carefully formulate my assessments so that they don't have an excuse to call and ask stupid questions like that.  I have to make sure I explain that a kid running down the highway high on heroin at midnight needs residential substance abuse treatment because he is a danger to himself.

    Yes, what we really need is more private companies adminstering public funds (sarcasm).  Oh, yeah: I'm going all political on your ass, when it affects kids, you bet I am.
  12. Yesterday morning, February 3rd, I was talking to someone about hey, maybe we're getting an early spring!  It was a bit breezy out, cloudy, and in the upper 40s. So, of course, by night time, there were dire winter warnings and part of I40 was closed down, and there was wet blowing snow and a howling wind at the Dream House.  F*cking groundhog.
  13. Thought for the day: It's never sexy when you take off your bra and some popcorn falls out.


    1. love these thoughts...sorry they kept you up/woke you up (whatever the case may be)

    2. Popcorn. Hahahahahahaha. Maybe I should tell you about the time I accidently wore two bras all day.

    3. Welcome to my world. I used to fight my 3am in-my-head-alarm-clock, now I actually like it. This is MY time of the day, no kid around to annoy me, no husband rushing off to work and looking for things that are right in front of his face. Oh, yes, I love them but I need my sanity breaks too.
      It is 4am where I live now, I already had my coffee, checked on the news (need to stop that - not a happy way to start the day), and in a by five I will be ready for my swim today.
      Have a happy and fully awake day,

    4. Have you read Amy Ferris' book "Marrying George Clooney, confessions from a midlife crisis"? Because if you haven't, you should. She's awake almost every day at 3 am and turned her thoughts into this book. It's fabulous.

    5. Number 13 made me laugh out loud.
      Thanks and I am So Happy It's Thursday!

    6. I like Richardson. I think he does a good job (everyone could always do better) and I am glad he fined Optima $1.0 M. It is crazy what they have gotten away with.

    7. Hee on #13.

      I once took my bra off and found an m&m. I promptly ate it. And it was good.

    8. hehe that popcorn comment had me giggling out loud! I have SO been there :)


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