I don't know what to make of the bearer of these invitations - either they are desperate to get out of the classroom, or desperate to increase their income, or both, more sympathetic I could not be; the problem is that they are trying to sell things to people who, like themselves, have a rather fixed income. One staff member is involved in three such home businesses. Another one is involved in her second in as many years, the first one being in erotic products (I have to admit, that was a fun party)
And it's not that the stuff isn't nice! Most of the time, it is. It's just that most of the time, I can get it on sale and save a lot of money. I LIKE my friends. Heck, some of them I love But not enough to support them by spending money on items I probably don't need or could get much less expensively elsewhere.
In any case it gets old. Once the year is rolling, I'll get one of these in my inbox once a week. So I'm thinking of creating an all-purpose invitation for folks so that they can just check off the boxes instead of doing up the invite in Word. It would look something like this:
P A R T Y ! !
I'm having a party at my house! You're invited; feel free to bring your sense of adventure, as well as() a friend
() your checkbook
() a hot dish
() cash
() a credit card
() a couple hours to kill
At my party, we'll chat, relax, and meet new people. You'll also have the chance to preview some exciting new--!
() overpriced makeup
() overpriced candles
() overpriced sex toys, lotions, and creams
() overpriced cooking utensils
() overpriced spices and condiments
() multi-level marketing schemes
() ideas about God, death, the afterlife, and paradise on earth
My party will start
() promptly at 4:00
() around 4-ish
() when I realize that, now I know who my REAL friends are
() whenever people gullible enough show up do so
() whenever I realize that, once again, I've been sucked into sinking a buttload of money into overpriced product inventory and I start hitting the wine.
...and last until
() the last person escapes
() the last person leaves
() I finally realize nobody is coming
() I eat all the treats and canapes I baked and pass out in a sugar and/or fried-food induced coma
() I bitterly admit to myself that nobody has my sense of adventure and entrepeneurship
~~~RSVP!
() Hugs and kisses
() See you there!
() Love
() Desperately
() Hopefully
() Optimistically
() Regards
,
() a work collegue you barely know
() a work collegue your sort of know
() a work collegue you've never met
() a work collegue you like quite a bit who has decided to take advantage of your friendship
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In other news: Tomorrow is Sweet Baboo's birthday. Send him some comment love.
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