Cheater!

While on our way to LooUHville in August, Sweet Baboo studied hard the rules for his USAT officiating test. And some of the behaviors of other racers I thought were just annoying? They're deal-breakers, y'all!

After the Prairieman, I excitedly asked the Baboo if he got to hand out any penalties on the course and he calmly informed me that it's not about handing out pentalties, it's about making sure that everyone has a good and fair time.

Yeah. Whatever. So did you write any penalites?
Officiating cult mantra aside, I have started to notice the things that he talked about when I was asking him about rule, rules, rules.

Even more awkward, I've seen friends of mine break the rules. I recently saw friends of mine applying body glide to a family member when she came through an aid station, something that they did not offer to other racers on the course, and I've read race reports about people having family members hand them things on the course and seen people whose parents or friends walked parts of the course with them.

I figured they probably didn't know that they were doing something that, if an official saw them, would get them not penalized, but disqualified. The big D-Q. Why they might have done that? Well, the options are
1) They didn't read the rules (stupid), or

2) They read the rules, and decided they don't apply to them, (Jerks) or

3) They read the rules, and didn't understand them (understandable) or forgot them.

I like to go for option 3. You can't teach teenagers who's favorite classroom questions is, "Huh? How what again? What are we doing? I don't get it" without learning to be infinitely patient and assume the best, so here I am, and it's a teachable moment.

Here are some things that can get you penalized or disqualified, if someone sees you doing it. And, they don't have to give you a second chance. This isn't high school, folks. You were supposed to know the rules. All they have to do is see it, and write it down:

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• Riding alongside your very bestest friend or sweetie, chatting away. (Dangerous and annoying). Drafting
  D
• Getting up on the pedals as that chick was passing you or right after she passed you, Mr. or Mrs. Thang, instead of dropping back out of the draft zone and waiting. Overtaken
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• Spitting out the top of your goo pack, or dropping anything (even a water bottle or jacket) anywhere other than outside an aid station and not picking it up. Littering
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• Having someone, like a friend or relative hand you things on the course. Outside help.
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• Having someone, like a friend or relative, do something for you at an aid station or or hold your special supplies for you, when they don't do it for anyone else. And, yes, that includes salt pills, body glide, or tampons. Outside help.
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• Swearing at another racer, a rude spectator, or an official. Unsportsmanlike behavior
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• Having anyone who is not a registered racer walk or run with you anywhere on the course or run with you through the finish chute. Outside help/Pacing.
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  Often the finish chute thing is overlooked, but you know what? It really screws it up for the woman/man finishing right behind you.
  
  Don't believe me? Watch IronmanLive sometime! Awwww, wasn't that sweet the way that guy, his fiancee, or their kids to run with him or her through the chute? But wait, see that guy running behind them? S/he had to actually stop running and wait to cross the finish line because of you, you inconsiderate idiot. At the very least, you ruined his/her finish line shot!
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  Sorry, but there it is.
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  Tell your families to stay out of the finish chute!
  
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• Wearing your ipod on the run. Wearing earphones.
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• Calling your husband or sister from the bike course to bitch about how hard it is (Are you kidding me? No. People I know have actually done this. I don't know the name of the rule it breaks, but I think it's actually a rule against using cell phones on the course. Maybe there's just an overall stupidity or whining rule)
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• Cranking the ac down to 50 degrees F the night before a race so that your spouse wakes up stiff and freezing (Okay, well, it's not a rule, but it oughtta be...)

So there it is. Commonly broken rules. If you're breaking them after this, then you'd decided to risk a penalty, and you've given up your right to be in a fair race, as far as I'm concerned, and you aren't a better athlete if you took unfair advantage or made it harder for others.

BTW, This picture (below) has absolutely nothing to do with triathlons, rules, or racing. It popped up in an image search of "regret", and I realized it was just too good not to share.

I include it without further comment. Enjoy.