Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Dear Pompous Idiot

I’m not sure exactly what you were screaming as you tried to run us off the road. When you scream at people out the open window of a moving car the Doppler effect makes it difficult to understand. The only word I could make out was, “A_ _hole”.

I can assure you that we were following all the applicable statutes while commuting today. It was very early, with little traffic, as well. I can further assure you, as you deliberately swerved in front of us as close as you could, that you were not. It’s clear, though, that we may have made you a whole 30 seconds late getting home, which was very distressing to you.

You did me a favor, actually. Normally I only see women drivers that angry, so it was refreshing to see a man that angry who, in retrospect, I suppose was acting like a woman. It gives me hope that it’s not just women I see exhibiting road rage as they pass inches away, angrily and impatiently gunning their engines. As a mental health professional, I can only assume that you have some issues, some stress that is superimposed onto the rest of your interactions with society, such that you vent at every stranger you see, however inappopriate your behavior may be.

Oh, And thanks so much for pulling into your own driveway and screaming and swearing at us from your very own front yard. I checked on Google Street, and saw the same dark grey Volvo parked in your driveway, and now I know where you live. I’ll be sure and share that address on every cycling advocacy website that I know.

Athena Misty


  1. Ahhh... the joys of cycling. I used to cycle in my own neighborhood until the day that one guy yelled at me for riding on the road and another guy yelled at me for stopping at the stop sign (that was part of a 4 way stop and a cross walk for school children) while on my bike.

    I'm just glad that you weren't physically harmed by this idiot!

  2. What a moron. I don't get it man. I was waiting to turn left a few weeks ago at the bottom of a hill (just as a car would if they were turning left). There were cars coming in the other direction. Once I had it clear, I turned. Apparently the driver of a car that was stopped behind me just couldn't handle it and screamed for me to get my a*s off the road. Um. Ok. Because a car in front of you doing the same move wouldn't have delayed you as well?

    I am so glad that you know where the douche lives.

  3. Is it too immature to do flaming poop bags on his porch??

  4. I was in the courtroom for this yesterday. The driver was convicted of assault for getting out and screaming at the cyclist.

  5. I like the flaming poop bag idea the best. Seriously, WTF is it with people? This is why I park at a friend's house near the Bosque trail when I ride to sucks, but I don't trust the douchenozzles on the road who yell at me for riding in the bike lane.

  6. I vote that you also send this letter to the editor of your local paper so the moron might actually see it.

  7. Pepper his house with literature regarding bike laws and road sharing and suggestions on how to start riding to work. You have the upper hand here: you know where he lives, and really what is he going to do? Say that you are harrassing him by education and by being concerned for his well being (suggesting a healthy way to get to work)???

  8. Criminal complaint to the police for assault and terroristic threat. Even if they don't follow up on it or he's never convicted, he needs something in his file (along with the hassle factor) if he happens to hurt someone some day.

  9. There are a LOT of unhappy people on the roads out there...

    We are leaving our house before five some mornings and wear our blinky lights and are up on the sidewalks (mtn. bikes) to avoid just that type of person.

    We got yelled at (by a woman) for riding along with traffic in a parking lot/driveway that she just couldn't wait for us to clear...
    I have no idea where she was going as nothing is open at that time, but apparently she didn't want to be going anywhere.
    Honey- you are NOT mad at us! But please don't kill us just because you hate your life! Gawd!

    (and be careful!)

    And YES...revenge, however subtle, would be great.

    How about filling out a few dozen subscriptions for magazines and check the "bill me later" box since you have the address.
    Make sure you get the business reply no postage cards that come in mags and maybe even find one from Penthouse or some such rag if hes' married. I am sure that will go over big! (teehee)

  10. Misty - so glad you are okay. Loved this post, got honked at by two cars today. Up yours I say. I definitely vote for the flaming poo bags and loved learning the word 'douchenozzle' from the comments. I'm peeing my pants right now laughing. Your blog kicks ass.

  11. Oh man, sorry, but one lesson I learned from reading this. . . I'm never getting on your bad side cause all your friends will help you seek revenge on me. LOL :) Glad you are ok and didn't get hurt. My husband and I always wonder why everyone is in such a hurry to get home? To watch TV? I would definitely send this to the local paper. Keep us posted.

  12. Nah, porno mags would be harassment. Many, many cycling advocacy newsletters, on the other hand, well that's education

  13. I agree with Greyhound - you should report him so that he has something in his record - he earned it!

  14. You are one tough cookie. Such behavior would mess up my whole day (or month), while you use it as inspiration and entertainment. Good for you!


  15. Some people...I often wonder why people get so upset by my presence on the road. The 10 seconds they lost of their life due to having to slow down to pass me must have been REALLLLY important!

    Love the blog and keep up the training!

  16. Where is this house?


Comments containing links to commercial websites from people with invisible profiles are deleted immediately. Spammers are immediately deleted.


 I'm no longer involved in multisport or endurance sports. I've started my own business, a psychotherapist specializing in anxiety d...