Thursday, July 20, 2006

Bitchy Tahoe post

I've lived and visited all over the United States. I've been to New York, California, Alaska, Hawaii, Florida, Texas, South Dakota...and more. I'll spare you the Johnny Cash lyrics.
In any case I now feel qualified to tell you where I think the rudist, most discourteous people in the US are.

California.

Hey, you think I like making this pronouncement? I want to like them. I really do. And, I will be the first to suggest that it's not necessarily Californians, but people I've observed IN California, who may or may not be Californians, California license plates notwithstanding.

It's just that so far, the only ones I've met have been incredibly rude and/or completing lacking in observance of the rules. There was a woman who I've nick-named F.U. McPhereson. She was standing on a bike/run path with her dog, talking on her cell phone. Appeared middle-class, blond pony tail, dresssed in running clothes. He wasn't a mean, menacing dog, just your average sniffy golden lab. He was mosying around sniffing, and ambled onto the bike path, where, as I swerved around him, I hollared, "your dog needs to be on a leash" (which, I should mention, is the law here). I didn't cuss. I wasn't even angry. Her response? she shouted profanities at me - and one supposes, whomever she was talking to on her cell phone, to wit:

"Hey, F&$% YOU! MIND YOUR OWN F&$%ing BUSINESS!! YOU OUTTA BE ON A LEASE, YOU BITCH! YOU DIKE BITCH!!"
Woah.

New Yorkers, contrary to popular opinion, aren't rude. They mind their own business, and they're in a hurry, but they aren't jerks about it. They're actually pretty friendly. People I've met in California, though, well, IT'S ALL ABOUT "ME" After a week or so of observing them, I've come up with the top ten things on your average person's mind while in California:

10) It's just a bike path. It's not like I have to stay on the right or anything.

9) Sure, I know he's only done action movies and weighlifting, but I think he'd make a good governor...

8) Why the &$%* is there so many compact car spaces? Screw it. I'm parking here anyway.

7) I don't care what the research says; I can talk on my--WOAH!!--cell phone and drive at the same time.

6) I don't care what the sign says. I'm not a slow moving vehicle. Those people behind me can just go around. On the right.

7) F&*$ you, man.

6) Hey, we can walk four across--there's room! People won't mind using the gutter.

5) What's that yellow line for?

4) My dog doesn't need a leash. S/he's special.

3) I don't care what the sign says; I'd rather drive on the left. I like this lane. People can pass me on the right.

2) Is this where I turn? Is it? No, it's not. No, wait, yes it is. or maybe not...turn signal? What's that?

1) I don't need no stinking bicycle helmet.

6 comments:

  1. sounds just like southeast FL. people can be so rude sometimes, especially on the road. New Yorkers just mind their own business. i don't care if someone doesn't stop to greet me. it's better than getting an FU for no reason.

    i hope you enjoy the rest of your trip (in friendlier places) !

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  2. Anonymous1:38 PM

    On behalf of my fellow Californians, I apologize. Unfortunately it's true. On the bike path I use, that is clearly labeled bikes only I have to regularly dodge all manner of obsticles, including walker/runners with dogs, horseback riders,ice cream carts, people just "camping," teenagers just "hanging out," etc. No one respects the bike. I just came across a blog post the other day from an LA woman who was complaining the bicyclists were "running her down" when she was running on the bike trail. Sorry lady, but it's a bike trail! I don't mind sharing the space, but at least run on the side and in the right direction so you can see the bicyclists coming.

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  3. Hate to tell ya, but them rude peeps are everywhere. I got screamed at in my race this past weekend, too... Like the bumpersticker says, "mean people suck".

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  4. Wow. I actually had that exact same incident happen to me last week, only it was in a cafe and instead of a dog, it was a three year old child who wandered in my way as I was turning around with a large cup of hot coffee without a lid. I suggested to the creature's mother that she might want to keep an eye on her welp lest she be seriously injured by falling hot beverages and the woman lit into me in full throttle, head bobbing rage. It was quite remarkable.

    I completely agree with your assessment of general rudeness in California and especially with your take on New York. All I can add is that if you want to see REAL rudeness in action, you need to visit Seattle. Them people take the prize for general assholery.

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  5. see? That's what you get for following the rules!

    Seriously, I'm on your side -- the rules are there for a reason. I think they should put a "NO PMS ALLOWED" sign on the trail, her outburst seems like it was beyond the pale!

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  6. OMG, I'm pissed off on your behalf. People like that blow my f'ing mind. I won't even use stretchy leashes with my dogs - I use a short training lead and insist they pull off the trail and do a sit-stay when people pass by just to be safe!
    You gotta wonder what kind of person she is to her nearest and dearest if she's comfortable enough with complete strangers to bring the bitch.

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