I'm plenty tired, but I can't sleep.
My sunburned shoulders and arms itch.
My legs want a word with me, NOW.
My quads are stiff and getting stiffer. I can't sit in a hot tub because my legs are sunburned.
I can't shave them either.
So I'm all itchy, achy, and fuzzy.
There was a worrisome pain in my right ankle. I hope it's just a muscle spasm.
My hoo hoo is badly chaffed. (How do you guys manage it? I mean, you have all that STUFF down there.)
I can't stop eating. I'm craving chicken, and I'm a vegetarian.
My arms ache from holding a handlebars in a stiff wind for 56 miles.
My eyes hurt.
My lips are chapped.
I've ruined my manicure AND my pedicure. Dammit.
My throat is dry and scratchy.
My chest aches.
My nose is chapped.
My hair hurts.
and all I can think is...
I wonder what else I could do?