Sunday, December 30, 2007

In which I honestly appraise my 2007 resolutions...

...and attempt to make new ones for 2008.

I don't hate the idea of resolutions any more. I think it's a fine idea to have goals.

here were my goals for 2007, and how I fared:

I resolved not to eat any chlorella this year.

Result: Check. You see, it's my firm belief that you should always include goals you'd do anyway. Makes you feel good about yourself. Things like, I will not eat a bug. I will not pet a rat. I will not eat chlorella. Stuff like that.

Also on the short list of virulently green things I did not consume this year: wheat grass juice. Along those same lines, I also resolved not to try to best Dean Karnazes' 50-in-50 feat (check) or run slower than I already do. (check) or eat disgusting water chestnuts (check).

I resolved not to punch out the next person that insists to me that whey is the superior protein and I'm really missing out. Okay, well, they were right, it turns out. I apologize to all the people to whom I've given dirty look over the years. Whey protein's really the shiz.

I resolved not to buy any more equipment for my tribike with the goal of saving weight until I've taken more weight off me. Okay, I *sorta* did this. I did not buy any more equipment for my bike.
I did, however, buy a new bike that weighs 19 pounds fully loaded. Does that count?
As for my weight, I am holding steady at somewhere between 158 and 162.

I resolved not to be so bossy in public. Check. Now I just give people "the look." Unfortunately, I have found that the same look that has frozen kids in their tracks for 8 years straight is completely useless in the real world outside the classroom.

I resolved not to go on, ad nauseum, about my sexy toe socks. Okay, I didn't keep this resolution. I just can't help it. In fact, it scored me a free pair, because I couldn't shut up about them to the Injinji people that were at the Las Vegas marathon expo, where I gushed nonstop about how wonderful I think their socks are and practically threw my panties at their tent. They invited me to select a pair, FREE, since I wrote about them on my blog. Or maybe to get rid of me, since I'm clearly disturbed. Whatever. Free sexy toe socks is free sexy toe socks.

I resolved not to criticize every west Texas town about how it smells. Check. I LOVE west texas. Every month except July. And, um, when the stockyards are thawing.

Now, some goals for 2008. Hmmm.

1. I want to do become a "marathon maniac" this year. I'm signed for five marathons in five different states, and if I do the Duke City marathon in late October and then do 3 more in 3 different states in 2009, I can join the 50 states club.
I don't know why that's important.

2. I'd like to do a 50K run this year. I'm already signed up for one, a 50K trail run in northern Alabama. Now let's see if I finish it. Before dark.

3. I'd like to finish Ironman Couer D'Alene before midnight, and this time without crying.

4. I'd like to get down to around 150 pounds this year. (That's 68 kg to our international friends and 10.7 stone for our friends north of the border and across the pond.) My actual goal is to have a lower bodyfat ratio.

5. I resolve to get my professional counselor's license this summer.

6. I resolve to lower the amount of fat in my diet. On the short list of things that must be avoided: Cheap nachos. The siren song of their cheesy-saturated-transfat goodness calls to me each and every time I go to the gas station. And then Pirate says, horrified, You run on that stuff?

Gratuitious boobs shot and humor, for the guys-->

7. Once again (3rd year's the charm?), I'm shooting for a 30 minute (or less) 5K. This year, I was able to do a sub-10-minute pace for one mile on 3 different occasions. Now I'd like to do it three times in a row, in the same event.

8. I'd like to bring my run volume up to at least 20 miles a week, consistently, for 3 weeks each month.

9. I resolve to clean out the den/study.

10. I resolve to write more silly haikus. Like these:

All these New Years goals
take all the good parking spots
in front of the gym.

Maybe the gym will
thin out if I put free cake
in the locker room

11. I will not consume wheat grass juice and chlorella, no matter how good woo-woo people claim they are for me. >shudder<

12. I will, as my very learned father used to say, $hit or get off the pot. In other words, quit complaining about my job or get another job.

13. I will try to talk more like a grownup and less like a high school freshman. I will say intelligent things like, "that's quite commendable" instead of, "that's the shiz" and "I don't care for that," instead of "that sucks."

14. Oh, a better person, make the world a better place, yada, yada, yada.


  1. Well, thank goodness for the wheatgrass thing..You guys are becoming running fools!!
    Happy New Year! Looking forward to IMCDA and the house on the lake witht you..

  2. They all seem like reasonable goal to me. Except the part about not crying as I cross the IM CDA 08 finish line. No promises there!

  3. Please don't stop complaining about your job - at least not on the blog. Those are some great posts.

    If you manage to meet goals 4 and 8 then goal 7 will happen naturally.

    My son has that poster in his bedroom - full size.

    Happy New Year! I hope it's the shinz.

  4. Anonymous10:38 AM

    Wheat grass shots give me "wheat grass burps" the rest of the day :(

    Good luck with the goals!

  5. First off thanks for the "Gratuitious boobs shot and humor, for the guys".

    Good luck on the 3X sub 30 min 5k. It's do-able!!

    And lastly from West Texas "we appreciate the open mind" either I got used to the smell or we cleaned up our act...ha-ha!!

  6. You had a great 2007 - Best wishes for an even more AWESOME year in 2008.

  7. Great goals! I'm 43 and I saw screw goal #14. It totally blows. ;-)

    I just found your blog last week. It rocks! Hope you have a great 2008!

  8. Great goals. You have 13 more than me!

    I have the same one every year, and it's to make the same goal every year. It's worked so far...

  9. Not crying while crossing the finish line? Geesh, I guess I'll have to be the crybaby then. It's cool. I can handle the pressure.

  10. Oh, it would be completely cool if I cried when crossing the finish line, instead of bursting into tears at t2 because my ass hurts so bad!

  11. Ummm, I have heard that is a rough 50K in Alabama. I'm just saying.

    Other than that, cool goals!
    I have one so far. Clean off the kitchen table so we can eat dinner off it, instead of on the coffee table, maybe, like 2-3 times a week.

  12. #7- totally with you. I would love to run 3 consecutive sub 10s. 6 would be even sweeter!

    You need another one: Keep on writing super entertaining blog posts.

  13. Yah...Whey is the shiz..:-)) Happy New year to you and yours!!

  14. Happy New Year GGtI - thanks for all the inspiration, encouragement and haiku :)

  15. On your quest for 6, may I suggest that any food which features "gas station" in the name could safely be eliminated from your diet.

    that includes gas station chlorella or gas station wheat grass shots (as if adding "shots" to the name sexes it up enough for it to be appetizing. Ew.).

    I sound like such a grown-up, I know. No need to thank me, I'm here to help.

  16. I'm with the Dread Pirate on the gas station food! Your father and I must have gone to the same school, that's my saying but I modify it around my kids:)

    Great goals!


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