Wednesday, April 23, 2008

It's a 2-fer.

I did go for that run and felt way wonderful afterwards. And mini-Baboo is better now.

You know, I can quickly identify problem kids because when they're absent, the class runs smoothly. Unfortunately - and other teachers can back me on this - those usually are the kids with perfect attendance. They fly under the radar, so that it's hard to pinpoint exactly how they're disrupting class. It's just that when they're gone, things are better. You may know adults like that. Chances are, they have a cluster B personality disorder. But we can't diagnose those until people are at least 18.
But I digress.

It happens that the culprit in Monday's fire alarm stunt was apprehended yesterday, and turned out to be the most obnoxious student in my last class of the day. I'm pretty sure that this is the kid that threw my keys in the trash. I had this kid last year, too, when I taught 8th-grade, and s/he put a ball point pen in my microwave, turned it on, and walked away.

This particular class, by the way, is the class that security guard Tom said to me, "has the worst kids in the school in it." So, "most obnoxious" in this case is highly relative.

So this student is in a buttload of trouble because it turns out that's a FELONY. Most people might not know that because MOST people don't think to do this kind of crap...but now this student is suspended for nine days, and full charges are being pressed. I feel bad for the Mom because she's actually a decent person who has no idea why her kid acts like this. I feel for her.

But it gets even better than that. The person who turned this student in is the second most obnoxious student I've got. And THIS student is, apparently, worried about getting jumped for ratting out the first student, and so has decided not to come back to school.

Yes, school violence is sad. But a peaceful classroom is joyful and liberating with two problem children out of the equation. Today, I actually taught that class. I think they learned it, too. Cool.

Oh, and special note to Cody the Clydesdale: I'm not really a hard liquor drinker, but thanks for the tip. Perhaps it's time to start working on a sugar-free sour/margarita mix. Lets see: Splenda, limes, lemon juice...



  1. Well, they make for GREAT stories, even if they're a PITA!!

    Thanks for the link - OMIGOD Histrionic Personality Disorder - I hadn't heard of that one, but it nails a few people COLD!! Now that we have a diagnosis....

  2. I've met several folks meeting the cluster B profile just this week. If you nail that SF magarita thing, I'm so IN! Be sure to share the recipe!
    Is it Friday yet??

  3. Anonymous8:37 AM

    Hey...I have a great light, crisp and refreshing margarita recipe! We call it a "Bruce-a-rita" because our friend Bruce gave it to us. Instead of using a typical margarita mixer syrup, you use has 0 calories and is 0 weight watcher points!

    For one drink, I usually mix a shot of tequila, a half shot of triple sec, fresh squeezed lime juice, and then the fresca. It's nice because it's not so sweet and syrupy.


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