Sunday, July 06, 2008

The following is offered as consolation for those who think they're dumber than me.

So, Tiger Lily and I are cycling on Old Route 66 east of Albuquerque and we're headed back in, and at one point she motions to a fork in the road ahead. "See where it splits over there? We're going to the left."
Left. She said LEFT.
She said it loudly, and clearly.

"Okay," I said. Because I had heard her, loudly and clearly, say LEFT.

And here's what my brain decided, as it listened to her and looked at the split in the road, was:
We're going THIS way.because this way is left.


So I took off - I was in the zone......speeding along, legs pumping, and I headed right at the split, just like my brain said to do, I was thinking, "this must lead up over to Tramway Road."

Then, Holy. Cow. I was thinking, as several cars and motorcycles went by me at a high rate of speed.
There is a LOT of traffic out today, I thought, as I sped up. The road became beautiful, clean, and even.

What a great road, I thought as I sped along on the nice, clean, even shoulder surface.

A semi sped by me, leaving a gusting wake.

Goodness! why, this road is practically a

Just then, my phone rang.

Annoyed, I reached for it. At first, I couldn't quite make out what she was saying, from the noise of the traffic.

Then I finally heard it, "YOUR OTHER LEFT! COME BACK!

oH. $#it.

Which is what I almost did, when I realized where I was.

So, okay - if you did something really dumb today, or hell, this week, this might make you feel better.

No need to thank me. It's what I'm here for:


  1. OMG!!!!! LOL!!LMAO!!! Thank you for sharing!

    Her is min- Hooch came home unable to get the passenger window up on her 1 year old car. Changed the fuse - no luck. Called the dealership and they only do scheduled appoinments on Saturday. I am really pissed. Raised hell and got them to take it in. Immediately they found the problem---childlock was on. Did I feel like a ranting idiot or what?

  2. Well, I am very glad your story is one we can laugh about.

    Be careful out there!

  3. Oh man! Becareful! That is so scary. Maybe we should do for you what I finally did with one of the little ones that I see in physical therapy... he got so tired of hearing us say "use righty" or "what's lefty doing, get him up here" about his arms that he quit listening. So, we named his arms Freddie and Eddie. He loves it and they don't get confused. Hmmm, just a thought. :)

  4. LOL. I had to read that post to my husband. We both had a good laugh, thanks. We guessed you took the next exit? Glad nothing bad happened.

  5. Ooops!

    (I'm glad nothing horrible came of it!)

  6. Uh oh! I do something dumb every day (builds character - riiiight) but I try not to do anything lethal. Glad you made it out of there!

  7. Oh dear, everything related to cycling is most trying! I am about to write up a blog post that will make you feel very accomplished in contrast!!!

  8. glad that wrong turn did not turn out very bad for you..

    hey...I have about 30 barin farts a biggy..(unless your riding with semi's is normal, haha)

  9. how convenient..

    i mean brain fart and I type barin fart... THAT was not intentional..


  10. You should compose a list of "Dumb things smart people do." At a race, I did an extra bike loop because, I , uh, sorta lost count. Then at a marathon, I stopped and looked around and thought I was lost. Some volunteers redirected me, but I still looked like an idiot.

  11. LMAO---not sure which is funnier JT's mispelling of BRAIN or your story!

    I'm just glad nothing bad happened. That's a little freaky.

  12. I have done that in that same place before-I PROMISE! Ended up on the freeway in that exact spot. It is pretty freaky..
    and scary..That corner is messed up!

  13. Hold up your thumb and forefinger.
    The one that makes an L is the lft one. The other one is the right.
    You're welcome.

    (Seriously funny. I was so tired from training last week I put my shirt on inside out and walked around for an hour before anyone told me. Once told, I took my shirt off and turned it right side out while standing at the nurses station like ti was some sort of locker room /transition area (I did have a tank top on underneath). My co-workers looked at me like I had 3 heads, but I was just tired.... )

  14. Okay, yeah, that is like my WORST nightmare!!! How far down did you have to go to find a turnaround? Thank goodness you didn't get run over by a semi. Silly girl.

  15. You would have been a hoot in the military...

  16. Oh My! I had to send that to my DH - that SO could have been me! He is always telling me "your other right" or "your other left".
    Thanks for the laugh. Glad you didn't get hurt!

  17. LOL That makes me feel a little better after totally crashing my bike and limping around for the rest of the day :)

  18. I turned around RIGHT THERE and worked my way back on the shoulder, slowly, keeping an eye on traffic. Luckily, I wasn't too far down.

  19. Anonymous10:31 AM

    OMG!! I'm glad you're okay! Me thinks my ding-battiness is rubbing off on you ;)

    I get lots of ribbing for doing things like that and also for being very gullible/easy to trick.

  20. D'oh! I've almost done that myself - it's a weird intersection, that one. You're not dumb, you're just carb depleted!

  21. Thanks. Having an off week and that really brightened my day!

    We've all done stupid stuff, but I like Rackham's excuse "you're just card depleted"


Comments containing links to commercial websites from people with invisible profiles are deleted immediately. Spammers are immediately deleted.

...and I, I have a goal.

Dear Diary, For the first time in 7 years I have a goal. It takes a lot to get me motivated.  I am the demotivation queen.  The princess...